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Loosening the Charge
Why it matters?
Different to emotional regulation, affect regulation is the ability to perform flexibly in a difficult situation regardless of mood or emotion.
With the ability to witness your affective state (the ‘valence’– positive to negative experience of your feelings or attitude, the objective arousal of your fight/flight system, and the intensity or urge you feel to react), one can “loosen the charge” of stressful stimuli and increase their tolerance to how that stimuli evokes a reaction.
Individuals with a broad range of affect regulation will be able to flexibly adapt to a range of stressful situations. This is particularly useful when we can recognize many of our triggers are originated in relational or historical trauma, rather than what is actually happening in the moment (ie. afraid of seeming stupid, not running away from tigers).
The more we contend with our bodily sensations strongly influencing our emotional reactions towards certain situations, people or things, the more practiced we can be at dissociating that “charge” from the emotional reaction itself, and learn to show up differently.
How it works?
- Think of the last time you were intensely triggered. What happened?
- Allow the emotions and sensations from that triggering memory to flood your system again and notice the quality of valence, arousal and intensity with which it has on your system. Describe the signature of that affect on your system.
- Employ effortful ‘allowing’ of that adverse experience happen in your body and get curious without avoidance or distraction.
- How can you detach the emotional quality (ie. It’s anger) from the sensations alive in your body (ie. Burning in the chest).
- Press your big toes into the ground, let gravity settle you into the ground, center your system and breathe. Hold a sense of integrity and ease in your system as you witness this affect in the present moment. Give it time as it dissipates.
- Ask yourself, “how can I be more at ease when his arises?” and practice this technique under low-grade stress situations.
Examples
Modulate your emotions by dissociating them from your affect to better meet the demands of your environment with less stress.
Sources:
Frontiers in Psychology:Embodied Affectivity Study by Thomas Fuchs and Sarah Koch
Affect Regulation Theory by Daniel Hill and Allan Score